The Trouble with Legumes

Posted in Learning Experiences, People on May 2 2012, by Matt Newman

My only run-in with the legacy of Pythagoras lies in a mathematical theorem: A²+B²=C². One of those familiar formulas you’re smacked around with in middle school geometry, something most of us had to suffer. (“Suffer” being relative to whether or not you’re as mathematically stunted as I am.) But in the shadow of this Greek philosopher’s lauded contributions to the number game, what else do we find?

Beans, actually–the same delicious, colorful family of foodie favorites we were talking about only recently. It’s thanks to the obscure (dare we say esoteric?) knowledge of Matthew Wills that we were clued into the rather demented history of the legume.

Bear with me here. I’m not running off on a mad tangent about the piddling dietary habits of a long-dead philosopher. Or maybe I am. It was during Pythagoras’ lifetime as a renowned Greek thinker and teacher that he seeded a bushel of ideas far above and beyond his maths. He also created a religion of sorts. And within the guidelines of that religion, supposed dietary restrictions. I say “supposed” because Pythagoras never wrote anything down himself; it was owed to his followers in succeeding generations that anything the man thought or declared was ever saved for posterity. In and among reflections on the transmigration of the soul and the importance of music, we find the humble bean.

The Pythagoreans, as they came to be known, were prescribed strict dietary precepts by their founder. Arguably, a follower must eschew all animal-based edibles in favor of a vegan menu. But a grave exception is made: stay away from beans.

The reasons for this edict are hazy, and prone to tedious reinterpretations (as ancient wisdom is wont to do when run through the sausage grinder of modern translation). The poet Callimachus cites Pythagoras in calling beans a “painful food,” something which scientists have attempted to unravel by blaming it on favism. Caused by a hereditary disease found often in Middle Eastern and Mediterranean males, its prime catalyst is the fava bean, which also happens to be a staple of the diet in these regions. Certainly Pythagoras wouldn’t want the men in his following riddled with jaundice, their red blood cells imploding in their veins.

Of course, Cicero blames the old master’s loathing of the legume on its ability to “cause considerable flatulence.” No argument there.

Other critics aren’t so sure the issue is with the bean’s threat to the body at all. It’s well-known among historians that early Greek and Roman democracies would vote with beans. As a pot was passed around a gathering of constituents, each person would drop a black or white bean into it, anonymously deciding the outcome. Avoiding the bean would, in a roundabout manner, suggest avoiding politics altogether.

Still others through history go on to suggest that Pythagoras kept away from beans for their supposed resemblance to a mother’s womb when sprouting, or, more colloquially, the belief that “beans” was an ancient euphemism for “testicles.” Do with that information what you will.

In the end, talk of the Pythagoreans and their classical war on beans falls firmly in the realm of the apocryphal. After all, Pythagoras never wrote any of this down; maybe he didn’t even have qualms with them in the first place. Are we merely the latest batch of fools hanging on a thousand-year word misheard from the mouth of the master? Oh yes, this makes me want to research into this pill resource blog for dieting and health. Until that answer comes along–if ever–I’ll keep cooking up my three-bean chili as usual.

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